Monday, January 14, 2008

Five Breakup Signs

How to tell when you're about to get the boot

One day, you are madly in love. You're cuddling on the couch, reading love poems and feeding each other sushi. And that's when it happens: Your partner sits you down for the "It's-Not-You, It's-Me" talk. You're confused and left wondering, "How could I have missed the signs?"

Breaking up is never easy. Your ego and heart are bound to get bruised. But if you could just see the breakup coming, it might make the whole business easier to stomach.

“While hindsight is 20/20, there are always warning signals”

Top five signs you're about to get dumped

1. Picking fights. No one is saying you have to get along 24/7. Constructive conflict can actually be good for your relationship. But if you find that your partner has become argumentative over petty issues like your clothes or choice of restaurant, that should serve as a warning sign that he/she may be looking for an excuse to bail.

2. Forgetting to call. Used to be that your phone would ring all day long with your sweetie wanting to make plans or calling just to say, "I love you." Now your significant other doesn't even call when he/she is running three hours late. It may seem obvious, but going from speed dial to a blocked number is a sure sign that your relationship may be nearing its expiration date.

3. Changing their stripes. A major change in appearance can be a sign that your partner is looking toward greener pastures. Whether they've chopped off their hair, lost 40 pounds or gone from a bold brunette to a sultry blonde, major cosmetic changes should be noted. Of course, there's nothing wrong with being a little vain, but if the change is accompanied by any of the other signs listed here, you may need to get ready to go solo.

4. Criticizing. If your sweetie isn't feeling you anymore, don't be surprised if he/she becomes less tolerant of everything, from how you brush your teeth to how you tie your shoes. Constant criticism is a telltale sign that your days as a twosome are numbered.

5. Losing sexual interest. A healthy sex life can make or break a relationship. If you find that your partner is becoming more sexually aloof, you need to get to the root of the issue. While it's natural to have less sex as you settle into a comfortable groove together, waiting weeks or months to have sexual contact is a sign that something is amiss.

Now that you know the warning signs, don't panic. Just because your partner exhibits some of these behaviors, that doesn't necessarily mean the relationship is over. In fact, it's usually a combination of signs and not one isolated incident that foreshadows a breakup.

If you're worried that your partner is itching to get out, the most important thing you can do is sit down and discuss your issues in an honest and open manner. If you take these signs as your cue to improve communication, your relationship may just have a fighting chance.


Unknown said...

Can I add one more sign? When your partner starts to discuss the 'unavoidable matters' that can make you and him/her can't be together for good. For example, different religions, different ethnicities, etc.

Salam kenal! said...

Hm ... in marriage life, all those five things were not a break up signage. It's part of boredom life.. ;-p

Anonymous said...

Hey Ecky,
Hope this is part of the 365 days thingy and you are not suffering a relationship meltdown.

Anonymous said...

hellow... interesting information... thank you for sharing it..

Anonymous said...

I've been in the "it's-not-you,it's-me-talk" situation. It was really hurt because I didn't have any feeling that the sudden break up was coming.

I'm bad at reading signs, i guess.. and thanks for the info, ecky :D

Anonymous said...

agreeeee...hehe...but I don't have any experience on that hehe..just hearing those from my friends..hope thats not happen...I will be more aware hehe..thanks for the info :)